Things I learn from therapy
(That title makes me laugh. But I feel a series coming on!)
Im starting to get really frustrated with my inability to "access" my emotions or however Tony sometimes phrases it. I'd like to think that one day all it will take is a giant meltdown where I 'get in touch' or whatever and then all of the sudden this fog will lift and I'll feel like a normal person again.
I also use humor when maybe I shouldn't. I build giant walls when I should be building bridges. And even though I want to (and do) tell you things, I guess I'm a little afraid to lay it all out on the table right away and all at once.
But I do want to. And I know I will, because it took great effort not to spill my guts yesterday. again and again. And maybe part of me feels silly for the level of spillage at this point, or the intensity at which I do so (and feel). oh well.
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My task for the week: Acknowledge and allow myself to be 'hurt'-- & don't feel bad about it and downplay it because I think it's unwarranted or silly. Allow myself to mend?
Be a kid! Draw this ball that I seem to keep describing. Figure out what things look like. Try not to shut them out when I recognize that they're there.
Im starting to get really frustrated with my inability to "access" my emotions or however Tony sometimes phrases it. I'd like to think that one day all it will take is a giant meltdown where I 'get in touch' or whatever and then all of the sudden this fog will lift and I'll feel like a normal person again.
I also use humor when maybe I shouldn't. I build giant walls when I should be building bridges. And even though I want to (and do) tell you things, I guess I'm a little afraid to lay it all out on the table right away and all at once.
But I do want to. And I know I will, because it took great effort not to spill my guts yesterday. again and again. And maybe part of me feels silly for the level of spillage at this point, or the intensity at which I do so (and feel). oh well.
------------------
My task for the week: Acknowledge and allow myself to be 'hurt'-- & don't feel bad about it and downplay it because I think it's unwarranted or silly. Allow myself to mend?
Be a kid! Draw this ball that I seem to keep describing. Figure out what things look like. Try not to shut them out when I recognize that they're there.
AKA don't be anal retentive.Don't deflect. Don't color inside the lines.
And try not to set up impossible rules
and boundaries for myself.
Oh boy.
And try not to set up impossible rules
and boundaries for myself.
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