Rants from High school: HEIMERVILLE

Oh my god, one of my greatest creations. After road tripping w/ dad back from Lehigh and Emory. There may have been 32 oz coffees, sleep deprivation, and cheetohs involved....

This farmland, which I formally declare as mine, and all mine, will have the following animals:

1. Baby Sugar Gliders: Bojangles and WaWa, his wife.

They will get married. Both will be wearing the best of the best when it comes to small animal- attire. There will be cake at the reception.

2.LLAMAS or Al Pacas, because my dad says they're littler.

I dont have names for them yet, but I will get specially bred llamas that are nice and pretty and play tag in the fields, and that DONT SPIT in your egg salad sanwhich when you go to say hi.

3. A goat named Ollie...only the best name ever!!

4. Maybe some sheep to keep Ollie company (see frances...sheep!!! wow im good.)

They will be fluffy sheep.

5. KITTIES!!!!

They will sweep the rolling hills with their cuteness. They will roam free

6. Prairie Dogs- fat ones - that have their own space and won’t intrude on the kitties' turf.

They will all get along, (the cats and them-duh.)

7. A giraffe...or just Norman! Because I love norman and he loves me.

8. A baby tiger that wont ever grow up.

I have to find a fairy to sprinkle special youth juice on him.

9. Monty, my boston terrier.

10. I want a koala bear that doesn't have fangs. Also-a 3 toed sloth that can camouflage itself in the trees when a plane comes by. This is all for protection you know.

11. penguins!

I will have the greatest mini-farm ever. People will come from all over to marvel at the sight of its supreme coolness. And i will smile and laugh to myself because, sorry folks, this isn't a petting zoo. Get back in your stupid cars. However, there's a gift shop to your right, feel free to help finance my coffee habit. Thanks, I hate the Bee Gees, and have a SUPER DAY!